Saturday, October 15, 2011

How To Approach A Zombie In The Wild

Chances are, you may encounter a zombie in the near future. Therefore, it’s very important that you know how to deal with a zombie when you find one.
1. Approach the zombie VERY CAREFULLY. You don’t want to scare it away!
2. Do NOT approach the zombie if you have pets with you–a large dog is capable of ripping a zombie’s leg off, and you do not want that on your conscience.
3. Pay attention to the sadness behind the zombie’s eyes. It will help you to empathize with his or her plight.
4. Offer the zombie a piece of raw meat. (It’s a good idea to keep raw meat on your person at all times.)
5. Using the meat, lead the zombie to the nearest ZAARG Outpost. (We will be setting up outposts in more neighborhoods soon!)
6. Congratulate yourself on helping the unfortunate!

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